July 2, 2024

My wife went on a work trip out-of-state. On the previous Friday, I ordered a corset. There’s the shocking opener, but since the Fall of 2023, I’ve been eating everything and exercising none. On March 14, I clocked on the scale at 169lbs. Never have I been close to that heavy. When I went on my work trip this Summer, a coworker said it’s obvious that I don’t go on walks anymore.

It hurts to put my jeans on, both around the waist and in the crotch. Belts dig into my hips. My body aches.

I did a little research after I got called out as fat, and found the unconventional corset idea. It’s for women to not look poochy in dresses, right? Yep, women only. Then it caught fire in my mind. I dreamed about corsets.

So taking the simple route, Orchard Corsets was a top search result, they have a sizing calculator, and a navigation heading for “mens corset.” Following their Youtube measuring video, I was a 38-35-39, or 30.5 at the waist when I sucked-in (hard). The Orchard calculator said to order a size 28, and I did.

It’s been a week that I’ve worn the corset every day, 2-8 hours. The internet has “seasoning” schedules, but I’m doing what feels right for the day. Hours after I take it off, I still feel different. Better different I think? My lower back hasn’t hurt in - I probably should have kept track?

In all this time, I haven’t told my wife. My educated guess is that she would give me one of her grossed-out, repulsed looks.

My morning weigh-in was 159.4lbs. Yesterday and today I did a second cinch-down, getting the external waist down to 32". It makes me wonder what the inside diameter is, under all the fabric, boning, liner and such. Immediately after I take it off, I have a 33" waist. Wait a few hours, and it is 34.5". It consumes much of my attention when I wear it.